tonights the last night

My tear stained bags are packed
I look around the room
and think of all the things
that you have done.
I sit joyously and wait for you to come home.

Replaying songs that remind me of you,
Missing you already.
I am not ready to leave.

Everything seems right with you around.
We havent even fought.
How can that be.
You make my sadness run and hide.

ECSV

You made me trip,
and I've fallen face first.
The rocks left an imprint on my cheeks.
Midnight tears haunt me,
Distance has become inevitable.

Its hard leaving
the missing puzzle piece behind.
These trains have brought
Bittersweet feelings,
Within the same breath.

What a beautiful soul.
Intelligent, Artistic, Musical,
Handsome, Hilarious, Quirky,
Lovable, Dorky, Adventurous,
Compassionate, Strong, Peaceful
...etc
No one I have met can compare.

I love Him.
That word can't even begin to describe this feeling.

Trains

The numerous cars
have brought me joy.
They have brought me sorrow.

One day they wont
be such a big part of my life.
As for now I have to plan the next
heart pain.

LOVE
an emotion I never expected
to experience.
It wont be taken for granted.
Impossible.

Silly

I am a lucky girl.

Insomnia

Frustrated
but not to much I can do.
I feel alone,
and cannot contact my loved ones.
What do I feel.
So fucking confused.
This is farther than I have ever gone
and I already feel myself detaching.

I cant speak my needs or my wants all I know how to do
is watch as it crumbles.
WHAT DO I FEEL????????

Gift

Harp as a heart
beats in the plucking of strings.

Living the normal life
is over rated and
too planed out by others.
I think adventure and unknowing
has lead me the right way thus far.

Awkward at the least

I love Your Existence.
I really do.
But can't you tell I am afraid of this.
My heart cannot handle pain, and sorrow.
If I love you will you treasure it?
You beautiful, and I adore that you love me.
Why don't I sense the fear in your voice,
I so badly want to tell you how scared and nervous I am.
As I open my mouth, the word are like vapor,
silent and invisible.
Baby I need your embrace right around now.
I'm coming soon,
save a hug for me.

Its all a cup of coffee

This feeling,
fills me with fear that inspires.
Distance,
soon to be abolished.
Are things moving,
a little to fast for my taste.
I'll admit,
I had to do with it.
That won't hold me back.
Just don't hurt me....

This is a feeling
I thought was lost forever.
Although many "Christians"
seem fake and much like cookie cutter.
I know, I KNOW the bible is true.

I need some one with a brain to talk to.
To discuss things with.


God, send me someone.

Werewolf Bound by the ocean

Holding Your Arm, Hands Clenched Tight
Looking to the stars we begin to take flight.
Across the Universe we roam.
Our surreal life has found the perfect home.
Trust between the beats of our hearts
Lets avoid death,
become Inseparable to start.
Sizzling foam on top of the sea,
is the song assuring the pieces fit snugly.




A man on the street
sings songs to his love.
She lives miles away
from his local train station.
The wind carries her voice from coast to coast.
As it reaches his lonely ears,
tears fall onto the strings of his vintage guitar.
Together they wander the pathways of their city.
Hoping to find the eyes that search for theirs.
What a painful love.

Thoughts and dreams of Arizona

replaying my dreams of a stoney werewolf riding a train all the way to his eccentric mermaid

Train Whistle

My limbs when weak,
Like the morning when we met.
I think my heart,
Started to beat again.
Hes back in my arms,
Trying hard,
Barely keeping composure.

A Mermaid and A Werewolf

The Chronicles of Inter-Species
And Connecting States

Giants

Repulsive and cute
Those things we did
Touching the sweat from under our arms
Then smelling the stench off our fingers

What? Gretchen?

Eloquently you lay out a simple set of words
Thoughtfully we analyze

Its become a stale taste
I familiar scenario
Repeated dream
Whats keeping me from turning away?
What is different?

Strutting down the corridor
Avoiding pointless banter
Heading B-line straight to you

Why must you whisper things
Which I cannot respond with
Anything other than a smile

Cut the wire
Fall Down the stairs
Getting into
A plot line with
The Stakes so high

Raise your Hand
Wink your eye
Step out the door
We have exploded

Come Away With Me

Conform
Conform
Conform

Think as one, act as an individual
Women you are the doll to be played with
The Painting to be looked at
Watered down like juice concentrate

Intelligence doesn't count for shit
Beauty must be everything
Take whatever means necessary to be made perfect

I'm Human

I mess up
I get angry
I become happy
I'm reminded of something
On a daily basis
One thing will remain the same in my life
And I am grateful for this
Not sure you can fully
Appreciate what I'm thinking and feeling

Smoking will kill me

Today is the day
I am making my life better
I am doing some spring cleaning
Getting rid of things
That aren't needed in my life anymore
Starting with smoking


I wonder whats going to be next??

Friends

Connections

the human soul
has a way of connecting itself
so fast
it blows my mind

Sexually
even just a few hours
or sometimes it can take
just one look
in order for you to be sexually connected with someone
meaning
a simple physical attraction
all the way to
a crush or puppy love

Friendships
It takes a minuet or two
for most often final judgments to be made
about a person
friend worthy or just another passing through

once basics have formed
it can take as little as a week to a month
to form that "special" friendship
some call best friends/family



now ponder this
What comes with this fast pace connections

quick let go's
from my personal life
i have noticed how
quickly
i am ok with letting
friends go
whom i used to call my family

this not only worries me but
intrigues my mind


people work in weird ways...

My confution soon made Its way to Happiness

Waking up to my sisters voice
yelling my name
Something that hasn't happened
for a few months now

This ignorant action
done upon me
brings a sense of comfort
in my heart
knowing someone who
I care deeply for is
there wanting my attention



On another note

Today is going to be busy
<33 love life for what it is
one day one moment at a time
you never know what will
turn into a forever lasting memory

Earl Grey and Batteries

All persons at one point in there life
will hear the phrase:
You Live and You Learn

Sometimes I find that hard to believe

Like today
I bought batteries
for my piano.
And instead of taking my time to open them
which would have saved the container
which held the extra batteries
i ripped it wide open
and all twelve of them fell to the floor.
AS for the container
completely torn apart.
which means ghetto
ziploc bag which ill probably lose


This is where i should have learned
I also bought earl grey tea today
which happens to be my Favorite.

My hot water is boiling
so i grab the unopened box and
rip the top apart...
why don't I learn??

is it the sheer excitement
of having something new
or is it my young, adolescent
brain which refuses to accept that
change is sometimes for the better

whatever it maybe
i sit here baffled and quite amused
=]

Beauty in the Breakdown

Come on, take a step towards me
So you can figure me out
I've been hoping and praying for a single way
To show you what I'm all about
And I know, and I know this is the only way of pleasing the crowds
But when this is over and done with and we walk away
There should be no doubts

So let's get a little closer now
Let's get a little closer now

You say, you say that we're all tied up
And wrapped around in useless, useless states of mind
But at the same time we're still young
We have the time to realize that we were wrong

Come on love run with me
Get the hell out of this town
So we can get a better feel for each other
I'll take you, back to, when you
Remembered how you used to
Just live your life a little for me
Take the time to let it go
Step away and watch me grow


So let's get a little closer now
Let's get a little closer now

You say, you say that we're all tied up
And wrapped around in useless, useless states of mind
But at the same time we're still young
We have the time to realize that we were wrong

You can stay if you want to
And I write to you and tell you how you've always been so special to me
You can stay if you want to, and I’ll try
You can stay if you want to
And I write to you and tell you how you've always been so special to me
You can stay if you want to, and I’ll try

To keep you close to me (x3)

You say, you say that we're all tied up
And wrapped around in useless, useless states of mind
But at the same time we're still young
We have the time to realize that we were wrong

I just want back into your head

Holy Shit

I woke up early

Thats all =]

Getting Thoughts Back to Peace and Serenity

The Past Few Months have been fast paced and non-stop
I have lost myself in the process
Taking a few steps back to enjoy the simple things again
To renew the calm tenderhearted me
I am going to the library to read
Then if time allows to the park to write my thoughts out

Tonight I am going to brush the dust off
My favorite book
And sit and read it.

Today is looking bright
=]